Sorrow For Only One
by FantasyLover100
Summary: "I love you, Lovi… and I'm sorry. I wasn't able to keep my promise… To stay alive." When Canada finally kills himself in front of everyone, it isn't his family he calls out for. It's someone different entirely.


_**Basically one of my ways on getting back at France, England, and America for forgetting Canada in some random fanfic where Canada is continuously ignored yet always forgives his family. So yeah, this is RomaCan, but Canada sorta dies. GOMEN'NASAI! And yes, I am aware that this is the third one-shot I've posted today, thanks for noticing.**_

"I don't want to be ignored anymore!" Canada sobbed as he clutched the gun tightly in his hand.

"Come on Mattie, you don't have to do this!" America cried, too shocked to move towards him.

It had all started out as a normal world meeting until Canada had barged in. He had proceeded to just start insulting every single one of the nations and pointing out every single one of their faults. Then he pulled out a gun and held it to his head, proclaiming that he couldn't take it anymore. His family tried to make him stop, but he just sobbed and cried, telling them what they did wrong with him.

And this is where they are now.

"Do you see me America?" Canada screamed. "What about you France? England?"

"Of course I see you lad!" England shouted, terrified for his former colony.

"Come on mon petit feuille d'érable, just put down the gun and we can have a nice dinner at my place, just like old times!" France tried. Canada shook his head and sobbed.

"No, you'll all just forget me afterwards! I'm done with all of you!" He positioned the gun in front of him and shot himself right in the stomach. Blood began to seep into his clothes quickly, but it seemed he didn't have enough. He shot himself five more times in multiple places in his stomach before he finally collapsed. America rushed over and caught his fallen brother before he fell.

"You're gonna be okay bro!" He cried. "We'll get you to a hospital!" Canada shook his head and looked up blankly. He was staring at America's face, but his eyes were distant and foggy.

"Roma… Where is my Roma?" He asked quietly. "My Lovi… where is he? He would have been here by now…" America, France, and England all looked shocked that he hadn't called out to them first.

"Lovi…?" Spain mumbled with a shocked look.

"Ve… Fratello said he didn't want to come today…" Veneziano said. "Why?" Canada shook his head and smiled faintly.

"That's too bad…" He murmured, but it was loud enough for everyone to hear. "Can you give him a message for me?"

"Anything you want bro!" America said, tears leaking out of his eyes.

"Tell him… that it wasn't his fault…" Canada said. "Tell him that I'm glad he tried but it wasn't enough. And in these exact words, tell him that I said… 'I love you, Lovi… and I'm sorry. I wasn't able to keep my promise… To stay alive.'" Canada coughed up blood and his head lolled to the side.

"Mattie…? Matthew…? Bro? C-Canada? CANADA!" America cried out in despair. He was even more hurt that his brother hadn't even mentioned him as he died. Had he really betrayed his brother so much that his brother wasn't even sorry for leaving him? He… why was he only sorry for leaving Romano?

"Sh-should we tell Romano?" England asked shakily.

"Mathieu said he wanted to tell Romano something… so we should," France said.

* * *

The next day, Canada's family drove up to the Italy brothers' home. They knocked on the door and Veneziano opened the door with a tired look. He let them in without a word and gestured to where Romano was sitting on the couch, blissfully unaware that Canada was gone.

"Romano?" France said hesitantly. Romano looked at him, only to roll his eyes and look back at the TV in front of him.

"What do you bastards want?" He asked.

"Do you know what happened at the meeting yesterday?" England asked.

"Why should I care?"

"Something happened with Canada…" America continued. He was surprised when Romano's head snapped up, eyes wide as he straightened up. They were all surprised that just Canada's name could bring a reaction from Romano.

"What happened with Matthew?" He demanded.

"Matthew… killed himself in front of everyone," England said, trying to get this thing over as soon as possible. "Shot himself in the stomach six times." Romano clutched tightly onto his pants, but he looked at them expectantly. They wouldn't tell him this without having more to say.

"He told us to tell you that it wasn't your fault and that you tried but it wasn't enough," America explained. "He also says to tell you, in these exact words, 'I love you, Lovi… and I'm sorry. I wasn't able to keep my promise… To stay alive.' What does he mean by you tried?"

"Damn it, I thought he was getting better!" Romano yelled. Tears that had been building up finally spilled down his cheeks. He didn't answer America's question. "He was getting better! He was finally starting to smile again! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!" His rant continued on until he was panting. He glared at the three nations in front of him.

"Get out," he ordered.

"Mon cher, we only wanted to tell you, you don't have to be so hostile," France said, trying to soothe the seething man.

"NO NOW GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Romano yelled. America was about to protest, but England placed his hand on his shoulder and shook his head. America paused and nodded, allowing himself to be led out of the house.

* * *

"I'm not going to go through some sentimental crap or any fake grievances like all you bastards have done," Romano proclaimed as he stood in front of all the nations in the church. "Because unlike you, I actually love Canada, more than any of you ever did. He told me that if he were to ever kill himself, he wanted me to read this letter." He held up a pure white envelope with a wax seal holding it together.

It was Canada's funeral weeks later. All the nations attended, and there was not a single dry eye. France could barely even stand. Romano was definitely the one who felt the same amount of remorse as Canada's family, maybe even more so. But now he was saying what he wanted about Canada in front of all those nations, with cold eyes of true hatred burning in them.

"'_Dear nations of the World,_

_Not a single one of you know me, and I was okay with that for a while. But then I realized that none of you would ever know me, so I got a tad depressed. No, I got very depressed. I even resorted to cutting. Then I met Lovi._

_Lovi knew what it was like to be inferior to your sunny, more energetic brothers. We were kindred spirits, I guess. We quickly became best friends, and it didn't take long for Lovi to figure out about my scars. He helped me recover though. We did start dating and I couldn't have been happier._

_I love Lovi more than I have ever loved anyone. I don't like his name, which is why he will always be Roma or Lovi to me. Never Lovino. Not once will that name ever be uttered from my lips. Lovi has never ruined me before, and he never ruins anything else. He helps. He fixes._

_If Lovi is reading this to you, then that means that I am dead. I don't know what has happened to make me decide to die, but it must have been big to not make me encourage myself by telling myself that Lovi would always be there with me. I would say I'm sorry, but I really am only sorry for leaving Lovi. I'll always feel some sort of remorse for leaving all of you nations, but none of you ever really took the time to become close to me other than Lovi, so I don't really care._

_Love,_

_Matthew Williams – Canada._

_P.S. Again, I'm sorry Lovi. And I love you. Please keep living for me. America, France, England, I'll always love you in some way, but it's nothing like my love for Lovi.'_ And that's the end of that," Romano finished. Everyone was in tears. America, France, and England were all confused and hurt that Canada didn't seem to care that he had just left them and all he could do was praise Romano.

"I can't believe the nerve of all of you!" Romano shouted. "You all say you're 'sad' about what happened to Matthew when none of you even know him! You wouldn't have even thought about him if he hadn't shot himself in front of every single one of you! There are reasons why I can't stand nations!" He laughed bitterly. "But you all don't care do you? All of you will go home and forget that a personification of Canada even existed! I bet you would just fight over who gets control of his land! I HATE ALL OF YOU! YOU DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT CANADA AND YOU'LL NEVER TRULY UNDERSTAND HIS PAIN! YOU'RE LUCKY HE DOESN'T BLAME YOU! THIS IS WHY I HATE ALL OF YOU!" Angry tears dropped down his face and he stormed out of the church. All the nations were shocked into silence.

* * *

"Lovi, really, did you have to yell at them all?" A soft voice sighed, a figure sitting next to Romano on his bed. Romano was glaring at the wall.

"They deserve it you know, for what they did," he muttered. The person sighed again and stroked his head.

"It's alright though, Lovi, you opened their eyes to what they've been ignorant of," the person said. "I couldn't be happier." Romano looked at the figure and smiled.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," he said. "It's about time they realize how wrong they've been all these years, Matthew." Canada smiled and stood, his pure white wings unfolding and seeming to glimmer in the sunlight streaming from the windows.

"I have to go now Lovi. Duty calls."


End file.
